White girl + black man is definitely the elephant in the room – but let’s take it a step further. Things have changed – drastically, and let’s just say, us black women don’t like the way black men are handling themselves.
10. Unrealistic Goals – Oh, you’re 6’5? – doesn’t mean your going to the NBA. Oh, you made those words rhyme all by yourself? – doesn’t make you the next Hov. No one aspires to become a doctor anymore? Lawyer? Teacher? Writer? No? Oh. Black women are very supportive, but kill the unrealistic goals bro.
9. “Got a main chick & got a mistress, a couple girlfriends – I’m so hood rich.†Black men flaunt the fact that they can get multiple women. No one wants to deal with that nonsense! Most black men are raised in a single parent home, where their mother subsequently treats her son like her man. Mothers baby their boys, unknowingly raising them to always be dependent on a woman. Mommy cooks, cleans, and lets you live off her – so you in turn expect the same thing from your woman. Most men wouldn’t know how to take care of home without a woman. Ever been to a single guys place? Yeah…nasty. Instead of having tons of women, just find one and work on keeping her happy. Trust me, you’ll be a happier man.
8. The “M†word seems to scare black men these days, more than the “N†word back in the 50s. You know how many times I’ve heard a man say he doesn’t believe in marriage? Maybe if you didn’t believe in divorce, you would look at life differently. Black love is a beautiful thing.
7. Black men seem to have the lamest dating strategies. Not saying you have to take me to the most expensive place, but no, coming over your house to chill and eat takeout isn’t on my list of fun first dates. I’m over the movies too. I can’t learn anything about you while sitting silent in a theatre for 2 hours. Take me to the museum or aquarium, bring a blanket and some fruit to the park. It’s not that hard to have a nice, cheap, out-the-ordinary date. Get creative.
6. Unmotivated. Irresponsible. Lazy….but talented. Are you proud of that? Man up and take care of business. Stop sitting around playing 2K all day. Stop waiting on line for 3 days for some sneakers. Black women see your potential and get mad when it goes to waste. Stop it. Grow up. Black men aren’t going to school. How many black men do you know with a masters? And of course school isn’t everything or for everybody. But start your own business. Stop being content with a job that has no growth. Think about your future.
5. Black men show no respect to black women. Would you call your mother the things you call us if we turn you down in the street? Treat us how you would want a man to treat your daughter and it’ll all work out.
4. Black guys love screaming loyalty but are usually the most unloyal ones. A black woman will stick by you through it all…cheating, lying, broke, unhappy, and she’s there to tell you everything will be better. What do you do? Turn around and leave her. Now she’s heartbroken and called bitter/angry. Learn to communicate better and more relationships will last.
3. What’s with the need to impress others? Stop living beyond your means. Stop scamming and stealing other people’s hard earned money to buy stupid material things. Why do you drive a 2012 BMW but live in mommy’s basement? Why will you pay $600 for some sneakers, but won’t pay $200 on a date? (lol, yes I went there). Key point tho…just be yourself.
2. Baby Daddy Syndrome – Riddle me this? Why have unprotected sex with a woman you wouldn’t want to bear your children. How many times have we heard a man preach he only deals with 10s – then you see his baby mother and she’s Queen gremlin in the face? He ends up not taking care of the child because he’s ashamed of his baby mother. Another black family doomed before it begins. Stop doing it to yourselves. Have some self-control. Aim to be a father, not a sperm donor.
1. Stop flaunting money and get mad when you attract gold diggers..If you take pics with stacks of money, pop 10 bottles in the club, buying Balenciagas and Hermes belts, why get mad if a girl wants you to buy her a bag? It’s simple math. You are what you attract. Fill a room with gold diggers and you’ll see only a handful of black women. A white girl will train herself to love you. Black women can’t fake it…we need chemistry. How many black girls you know who stuck by her broke ass man because she loved him? Stop trying to throw black women under the bus saying we are only in it for the money – before your beloved Becky ends up taking you for everything you got.
Moral of the story. Black men we haven’t given up on you. You will always be our Kings. But get it the F*CK together. ASAP.
Well said.
That’s a good one. Unfortunately, I think I am going to give up on black men. I am just tired of them. It seems like they want to run away from their origins at all cost.
This is a very truthful article,
all the black men I have known want to be a rapper, athlete, Nino Brown and Scareface and have so many babies mamas its unreal.I have dated both black and white, I have never been treated badly by a white guy, now brothers, well that’s another story. Brothers dont know how to act or treat women so im done with black American men. Im engaged to a wonderful white guy, without drama or dreams of being scarface or baby mama drama. Black women need to start closing their legs to foolishness and stop having babies with men who are not your husband. As long as you deal with Leroy that treats you like trash the longer you will be unhappy. Im just saying.
Sandra, you said you were giving up on Black men because so many of them are running away from their origins? So if black men are running away from their origins, your solution to this is to run away from “yours”?? If you want to date outside of your race then just do so. I don’t think you need to explain or try to come up with these “reasons” to do so because that reason you just gave didn’t really make sense to me. Anyway, peace.
Although the article makes plenty of sense, it would make EVEN MORE sense if a lot of black women would stop wasting their time with brothas who fit this article.
Damon, the only type of “brothas” are the ones who fit this article and the halfway decent ones who think they’re too good for black women. Either way, neither is worth any black woman’s attention.
So glad I’m a lesbian, because if I liked men I think I’d have to die single. White men are crazy, lame, arrogant, and the ones who like black women seem kind of ignorant racially and too into stereotypes about sex and @ss. And Asian men don’t like us, and Latinos are sexist like black men are.
There are good and bad people no matter their sexual orientation or ethnicity. There are plenty of black women who are married or dating white, Latino, European, Asian, African, Middle eastern men.
Yes black women that date interracially have had ups and downs which is normal in the world of dating. These same black women don’t pack all of the bad experiences she had into an “all men are douchebags and only want sex” category and do not give up. Instead they take a break from dating for a while, and then try again. Guess what? They find a good man.
There’s a saying, “you are who you attract.” If you act a certain way i.e rude then all you’ll attract is the same kind of people. By the way you write – your are using your so-called lesbianism as a scapegoat to bash men. But since you are lesbian (if you claim to be), why be negative to men that you came across who aren’t the majority?
Are you lesbian because of the bad experiences you’ve had with men in the past? If that’s the case then it is understandable to a small extent, but being gay isn’t a fad like the media and society makes it out to be. It’s a lifestyle and if you are in it because you’re pissed off at men who did you wrong then you are in it for the wrong reasons – you seriously need to get some therapy.
Yeah there’s jacked up men but maybe there’s something wrong with YOU. On the other hand if you know the areas you’re in or frequent have nothing but bum hood dudes with no respect for women, then don’t go in those areas! Find different routes. No woman should but if it makes you feel safe then do so.
Finally, reevaluate your thinking process and do so outside the box. You’re giving into that fucked up stereotype that lesbians are angry and bitter misandrists. If you do decide to date men again, I highly suggest you work on your really terrible attitude.
I’m mixed and have been married to a white guy (that is the love of my life and treats me like a princess) for 13 and a half years. I have a friend who is white, overweight and dates nothing but black men and most of HER overweight white friends date Black men and it is the same story over and over and over and over again. With all of them. Dudes that are lazy as hell and won’t work. dudes that have tons of illegitmate children by tons of different baby mammas. Cheating. Lying. I cannot for the life of me understand why ANYONE would choose a black man. 95% have absolutely nothing goes for them. And they’re happy that way! Black men are bums, utterly worthless in every way. they bring nothing-NOTHING-to the table. Black women are surpassing them in every way, but still coddle them even as they lay up with chicks that look like honey boo boo’s mother. Black women, Stop this undying loyalty to men that hate you and have given you nothing but grief, heartache, tears, pain, and suffering. I never, ever dated black men because they have the grossest character defects of any human being on this earth and frankly, I just wasn’t attracted to them. I can see why fat, gross white women that are rejected by white men turn to black men. They do it out of desperation and as a plan b option, because BM have no standards and love to date the scraps and leftover’s of white men who DO have standards. But I never could understand why attractive and successful BW loved and defended them. I still can’t figure it out. I agree with Myesha. Forget about BM-they are an utter waste of human flesh!
l honestly believe a large percentage of black men hate black women. Not all of them! Why? #1 reason is they’re jealous. Society has always allowed the black women more opportunities in corporate america than a lot of black men #2 They hate us for not taking care of them like white women will financially and in many other ways- Boy groe ip I’m not your mother. ln my opinion to all other races of women, please take them off our hands. We’ve been there done that, your trying to catch up on our left overs boo. #3 Misery loves company. They think we should be down and out because they are. Not happening. This is America if you want to better yourself there are other things you can do besides work in corporate America if that’s the case. God blesses those that have there own, not somebody else’s If you spend less time on hating and take that energy to better oneself you would probably be wealthy by now. Besides l know who’s really running things. White man has all the money and sisters have all the strength. That’s why all other race of women are trying to be us. Signed divorcedsinglehappynokidsandboss…
To the ones saying black men hate black women. No. Black men hate themselves. Let me tell you why.. The truth. The deep rooted truth. Some black men only be with their masters because that is where they have always been more comfortable since the days of slavery. They have been beat and broken so badly that they can’t even exist without some form of Caucasian existence in their lives. They need and depend on them in order to feel like a “man” or of some type of value or humanity since their own race is not enough for them for whatever reasons slavery instilled in them. They are like broken horses. The black man is and always will be the white race’s horse, and the weak, low self esteem black man allowed this and allowed the white man to get into their minds and spirits. And they think they are getting under black women’s skin with their self-hating ways. And then they claim it’s love as if they know the meaning of love. If you can’t love and respect yourself and your own people, while knowing where you come from, then you cannot truly love and respect, period. It’s all a front and a sad, failed attempt to look “valuable”. As if that makes someone valuable. ? Please, they are the ones we actually pity. They are doing us a favor by getting the hell on after us seeing what they really are, they aren’t worth being in a black woman’s presence. And they are just jealous because black women remain strong and proud while they remain weak and ashamed. And we always will be stronger than the little boy black men who can’t handle business so they need someone with low standards like themselves who will be okay with settling. They confuse jealousy (nothing at all to be jealous of really) with pity. They are so delusional, broken, lost, and worthless, and everyone along with black women, would agree. Instead of dealing with, changing, and problem solving within their own race like most other men of other races who understand the importance of loving and preserving their race and origins, they run away like cowards with their tails between their legs like the weak, lazy, little boys that they are, on to their masters because they feel that they have no control within their own race. They constantly need instruction and can’t live decently without it. Instead of just taking control properly and reasonably, they’d rather have it the easy way and run to someone who they can easily control with little or no real work or effort.. Hence, they are the laziest people.. And lovers, that you would ever meet. And “some women”, if you want to call them women.. Little girls.. Or kitty cats if you will, with lower standards are okay with this… They may think they feel better or are better once with their masters, but the truth is that they will always be broken, sad, worthless deadbeat bums on the bottom of the shelf and not a woman on this planet will ever change that. All they are good for is sex (and they aren’t even that good if you ask me, they’ve gotten lazy with just about everything), which is why they run to the same types of women who are only good for sex.. Ignorant goofy and goofy looking sex slaves is what they are along with their master “spouses”.. Even during slavery days, white men used white women as sex slaves and even beat them. That is why some white women are so slutty and classless, just like the black man. So black men and white women relate to one another because they have always been at the bottom of the barrel… Trashy, immoral animals. Nothing else going for themselves. Both desperate, with false confidence, and pathetic, and laughter-provoking. I honestly can’t help but pity, then laugh… ? because it’s just unbelievably sad… But funny at the same time! But any attention is some attention, so black women, stop showing it any kind of attention. That’s how pathetic BM are. They do things for attention like little boys who have never grown up when really they just look stupid and it does nothing else. It doesn’t fix their worthlessness issue lol. All they have going on I guess. Black women, it’s better to ignore their ignorant self hating behavior like the adults that we are. It’s not funny, however, in the aspect that the black race is doomed, as the black man has always done the white man’s dirty work of killing off his own people in many ways, as the white man wants. Makes the white man’s job easier when their horses are at work. Black men can run to all the different types of women they want and that will never change the fact that they are ever so worthless themselves.. And becoming more and more worthless by the second. But no woman is the cure to or cover up for their patheticness.. The ugly truth still shows.. And they know it. Black women deserve better and should leave the trash (BM- that’s black men by the way, not bowel movement, but all the same) to their trash. They don’t deserve a queen so beautiful all over and valuable. Only plain goofy trash deserves plain goofy trash.
I remember 2012 well. Height of child endangerment (equally negligent to so called abandonment)… height of Scandal tv….height of prostitution…. pro swirl…. ghettogaggers and so forth. Black females were in noooo position to shame or indict any black man on disloyalty or irresponsibility. Why are black females NEVER persecuted for their self – hurtful contrary and disrespectful never ending antics also against black men and black boys especially the decent, honorable & useful ones. Too bad theres so much lying to the world and lying to/about each other.smh. i love you anyway not as easily as before. I was told to only water what waters me also. Sisters have purposely not watered good black men in forever.
I really believe a lot of black men are suffering from low self-esteem and don’t know how to deal with it/get help/ express themselves. Instead they dump all of it on black women. Yesterday, I was at this baby shower and when I went to the bathroom these guys were saying something similar as to who was going to hit that while I was walking by. They not only said it loud enough for me to hear, but several times so I could hear it. I ignored them and kept walking, mostly because they were in their 20s and I’m over 40. I worry about my younger sisters, because these are definitely the men they have to choose from. And their future look bleak.
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