Breaking up is never a simple task. Especially when you’ve gotta do the dumping.  If you’re a total schmuck, this article will be irrelevant.  But if you have a heart, follow these detailed steps to let them down easy.  Find out how after the jump!

@Jazzyvadney

1.  FADE TO BLACK:  Start decreasing the amount of time you spend with your soon to be ex.  This will make it easier for them to accept your absence when you completely fall of the face of the earth.  Just like you’ve gotta wean babies off of the nipple, you’ve gotta wean them off of you!  Lol, weird analogy I know.  But trust this will make all the difference.  After a few weeks of face to face deprivation, intiate break-up!  Now that that’s set in motion, you can prepare for the AFTERMATH!

2.  OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND:  Ok this might not be completely true for your ex but seeing them surely won’t help them cope.  Don’t visit or try to be a shoulder to lean on.  Tough love from a distance is KEY.  Yes, you might feel bad for them and want to give them some sympathy sex but this will only give them false hope!  They’ll be calling and texting but WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T SEE THEM!

3.  BOUNDARIES:  Let them know whether you intend to be friends or simply remain cordial.  You don’t want them to have to guess what this is.  Inform them of the new boundaries i.e. no late night booty calls, no visits, no dates, no meeting up, no nothing! 

4.  LAY LOW:  Don’t be places where you know your ex could be.  You want to decrease the chances of you running into them.  Even if it means going out of your way to club across town.  Give them their space, stay out of their territory! 

5.  DON’T FLAUNT IT:  So you have a new guy or girl.  Good for you, but bad for them.  They’re STILL getting over you!  It’s only been three days LOL.  Give it some time before you go showcasing your new love interest.  Don’t be places where you both be at wit no Biyatch!  Couldn’t resist the JOV quote.  I digress, this means, no mobile uploads to Facebook of you two feeding each other ice cream and cotton candy at the carnival! HA!  That’s just plain mean! 
Now, if you’ve read this entire article you are an ARROGANT SWEETHEART!  Kudos to you for caring but really and truly get over yourself!  They might be over you already!  But if not, employ these strategies!

Hope that helped!